Take Your Energy Back

Sometimes the world doesn’t see you the way you want to be seen. Sometimes, you’ll offer your heart to someone and they’ll give it right back. Sometimes you’ll forget just how awesome you are. Either that or it will be hard to believe it. These moments take away vital energy from our bodies, making it tough to get out of bed or have the same motivation as before (before the defeat).

Create Space for Slime

Now that winter is coming and the cold makes it even more tempting to slow all the way down, it’s been especially challenging to feel like I can get out of this funk I’m in. But I’m here to say, I’ve done it before and I’ll do it again. This time, I want to share what works for me and I believe it will work for someone else. So, here it goes… When you’ve been cast into darkness, stay there.

Yes, you read it right. I’m suggesting you feel all of your feelings and move through the pain. Work with it, not against it. Feel the pure and heavy sadness in your body and allow yourself to rest in whatever way feels good. I’ve been sleeping in later each morning, even now I’m writing this post from my bed because it feels oh so nice. I’ve removed the pressure of having to get out of bed to “get things done” right now because my sadness still needs attention.

When we create space to move through the heavy moments, they do not control us. Making room for dark spaces allows us to pay attention to what’s happening and really learn from it. We’re curious, open, less anxious and receptive. We’re not trying to cover it up, ignore it, work through it at our jobs, drink, smoke, or fuck it away. We must completely surrender.

Ride the Wave

I know that doesn’t sound easy or fun. And guess what, it’s not. Is it highly effective though? Yes, it is. This is how you take the reigns and ride the wave instead of flailing your arms around in a typhoon. Not all of us have the luxury of sleeping in late and journaling from bed, but I encourage you to find your own way to create introspective space. This space must be for you alone, with only your muddy baggage to unload. Maybe take some time out of your day to get out into nature or curl up at night with a new book. I can tell you too, that the more you do this the easier it gets.

I’ll ask myself the question, “How is this happening in my favor?” “What am I meant to learn from this?” I’ll reaffirm in these moments that I am enough. It doesn’t help to obsess over what could have gone differently if I had done something different. Everything is happening as it should be and I am exactly where I’m supposed to be.

The more you allow yourself to feel the extent of your feelings, the more effective you’ll be at recharging and getting all that energy back that was taken from you. The trick is not to stay in this sunken place, and there’s no time limit on how long your hermit process will take. Be gentle with yourself, and also have a plan of escape.

All Systems Go

While walking through your dark night, it helps to visualize what it would be like to move on. What does it look like? Feel like? What is the new task at hand? Imagine being completely filled with new light from the sun, a new pep in your step. Eventually, you’ll start to move toward that light in your own time. You’ll make art, finally clean your room, wear that new hat you bought last month.

I believe people with ambition, open hearts, big ideas, and the like are all doomed for defeat many times throughout a lifetime. This is one way I've found that helps make the blows a little less impactful. As I post this and curl back up into my bed, I hope someone out there gives herself permission to let go along with me; To listen closely to herself; To take action by no action. Just be.

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