Being Stuck in a Place of Prayer & Party

Akilah Ivy
3 min readDec 27, 2022


Life is always coming at us so fast, and sometimes our bodies are not able to keep up with the thrust. Only until we make the space to slow down can we really feel the effects of time.

This past year has been one that has given me the ability to slow down and heal many parts of myself. I probably would have never been aware of these things without this space.

This has been a part of an in-between phase having left one career path and slowly climbing the ladder of a different one. I am single with only a one year old Havanese pup to care for right now. So, I want to acknowledge this moment.

No matter how many things I desire more of, I’ll always desire more of something. However, I’m so grateful for this moment when I’m able to party with my friends whenever, wherever I want and also spend hours on end in meditation when I want.

Even being able to travel freely on retreats for my own spiritual journey always feels like such a blessed privilege.

I’m trying out all kinds of things. And it’s been so exciting, but now I’m realizing more and more each day that I’m growing out of this particular phase of my transition and moving into a phase of action through a new found courage:

Courage built from new perspectives forged in the fires of this phase. All the hard work: the self-exploration, the shadow work, the work with plant medicines, the therapy, the workshops, the intensives, for the strength that’s needed ahead.

You see, this phase is good for a time to work through stored up shit. All the mess from past traumatic experiences that is keeping you down can finally be met head on, face to face.


You can have fun with life and laugh a lot and try new things and love many different people in many different ways over and over again. And after a time, (and I don’t believe there’s a way to measure how long) it will be clear when to move from the prayer & party phase to a time of action.

I feel this call to action in my newly strengthened bones. It’s an itch that keeps on itching and a tune I can’t ignore. So I’m getting very clear about what I want to achieve in this life and going after it with more clarity. With a new fire in my belly and sharp focus, I’m taking bigger, more calculated risks for the fulfillment of my wildest desires.



Akilah Ivy

Traveling nomad & cosmic oracle. Art curator & alchemist. Sharing my experiences and discoveries in spirituality, storytelling, and liberation.